What's funny about this one is I can't think of ANYTHING. really.
I'm always saying I don't want to live in regret, so I don't.
There are things I have done that probably weren't the smartest or best options, but I don't regret anything. I've come to learn that I am the person I am today because of my trials, self induced or otherwise. I really have done some stupid things, but I've learned so much about myself or what consequences I can endure that I'm ok with my stupidity... as long as I can learn from it, and NOT repeat it.
I was watching 13 going on 30 not too long ago {my monkey really likes that movie... go figure}. There's a part where the 30 year old daughter is talking with her mom about regrets. The mom is asked if she regrets anything in her life, and she says no. Because she wouldn't be who she is today without making all the decisions she has made, good or bad, right or wrong, and she's happy with how her life has turned out.
I'm going through some really difficult things right now, I could easily "regret" my choices that have brought me to this point. What's interesting is I don't regret anything. {part of it is I didn't make the *big* decisions to create the situation, I've just had to deal with the consequences} I actually can't say that I'm *happy* with my life right now, but I feel good about the direction I'm going. I have some rough roads ahead of me, and I pray everyday I can find my way through, and I have faith that I will make it and even be better than I was before.
something you wish you had done in your life...
Alright, I think I've said this quite a bit, but I'm not so into regrets. I try to do what I can not to have those feelings.
With that said, I've realized that's because I have felt regret.
I love basketball. I remember in 6th grade being on the Jr. Jazz team and I LOVED it! I wasn't too incredibly good at it, but I would practise for hours, find friends to play a game with, go practise dribbling on the side walk. Did I say I loved it? I did!
When I got into high school I distinctly remember the day they announced girl basketball tryouts would be coming up, I was SO excited!
at that point, I was in wierd living arrangements, and didn't feel I had support in getting home from school if I stayed after. And unfortunately I was really shy, at that point, and didn't dare ask for the help I needed.
I didn't make it to the first day of tryouts because I wasn't sure I could get a ride home afterwards. Once I missed the first day I just made an assumption that I couldn't go to the rest of the tryouts. {I didn't know for sure, just assumed.} So it turns out I didn't even tryout for the basketball team.
I still had a couple more years of high school, I would tryout the next year. But I never did. Later, I didn't have any friends that played basketball. My friends were on the drill team, which I did try out for but didn't get on, and in other things I already was doing. So I didn't feel comfortable with the girls on the team already. Did I say I was shy? I was S.H.Y.!
I remember going to a girls basketball game and turning to one of my friends and saying, "I'm going to tryout for basketball next year. Even though I'm going to be a senior, I really want to go for it."
But I didn't.
I was afraid.
And I really, really regret that.
I still love basketball, I'm still not very good at it, and I still don't dare to go find any local teams to play with, because I'm not very good. hmmm, that's something I can try to do sometime in the near future.
Get out of my comfort zone!
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